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1 Thing I Wish Some Churches Would Change

I just read an upsetting story about a pastor a few minutes ago.. I’m sure I was supposed to react with anger or frustration… but my main emotion would probably just be a deep sadness.

I love God, I love genuine churches and genuine people. So before I continue that is where I stand.

With that said, I think you can believe those things and still agree with what I’d say next.

While there are still good people in the world and good things happening, if you look around we really are on unstable footing.  I believe many churches are as well.

I’ve had a little bit of experience in youth ministry, as a volunteer, as a “leader”, and various miniscule roles. If there was one thing that frustrated me the most, it was probably attitude.  I understand the role of a leader is to lead, to be an example, and to help take others by the hand and join in each other’s burdens along with other things, I get that. The understanding of what a leader was, was not an issue for me. I think why I ultimately found myself frustrated and hurt with church people was because I had held that title.  If I could name one thing (that is relevant to this post) that I would change about churches it would be attitude.  Geee whizzzz, it is as though people think if you go to church you have to act perfect, dress perfect, always be happy, and anything else that fits the “Christian image”.  I’m not saying I never did this, because I can remember many times that I had felt pressure to be this way and acted on it. I cringe when I think about a few encounters where if I think back I know I came across as a judgmental, “holier than thou”, exempt from any temptation or sin kind of person.  I am laughing as I type because I can remember a time. In fact, I started this blog when I had really gotten sick and tired of feeling like I should act that way, or from others acting that way.

I was raised catholic. So, I am used to the saying your sin out loud and to others kind of thing. (*I know you’re thinking, “OH MY HEAVENS you are supposed to ask the Lord forgiveness, forgiveness only comes from God!!!!!!!!!!!” Well join the party people, we believe that as well, we just also remember that scripture that says stuff like confess your sin to one another James 5:16 so back off with the judgement. 😛 ) Just had to clear that up while we are here… haha

Well I would try that out to other members in the church (not talking about a priest or a pastor here) and I QUICKLY learned who I’d go to for that, because maybe I missed the “go and tell all your buddies, friends, and give judgmental faces” scripture. I don’t know it was not an uncommon theme.  That wasn’t even the main bother though, that was just the rice not the whole enchilada. I think what ultimately lead to suppressed frustration is that I stopped feeling like I could talk to people in the church because I “wouldn’t be fit to be a leader” if I actually talked about real problems, or real issues. In my opinion a leader could still be a leader if they talk about their struggles, are open with them and show how someone else could work through them victoriously with God! Whelp, I eventually got so frustrated I would just pretend like I was doing bad things to see what reactions I could get. (Immature? Probably. I just really like to analyze situations and observe, and what I thought was right.)  You know what I learned, people “love you” when they think you’re down but even then, not very many want to help pick you up. Once you do “get up” though, people don’t celebrate like the Prodigal Son story. Then comes the “who is better than who” and comparison game.

~Random side note: In churches I think there is a serious problem with comparison. What people are doing, what people are wearing, who is “outreaching” more… It is honestly never ending. Sometimes I dream about how amazing it would be to be able to honestly celebrate one another’s successes, marriages, victories, and journeys.~

I understand a leader should be an upstanding kind of person. I’m not talking about anything that would contradict that here. Just what I would consider common struggles, fears, anxieties, etc.  I’m also not talking about like 5 people I know, this is not confined to one group of people, one church, etc. I think as Christians we need to learn how to sit down, hush up, and just listen.  It is amazing what God can do in that situation, and in a relationship when two people are just listening and truly there for one another.  I wish we could see that in other people’s times of pain, it is not our moment to show just how “great” of a leader we are by speaking condescendingly, acting like there is something wrong with the person trying to share, trying to fix the other person, but simply taking on one another’s burdens with grace and love, and assist them in getting the help they need.  In my opinion, if you don’t think you can do that for someone else then are you truly a good leader/ Christian/ friend?

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Get a Small Dose of Fear in Your Life

It has been a long while since I have written something. Well maybe not, but everything truly enjoyable does seem lifetimes away. 😉 I make a lot of jokes about how difficult I find this process of medical school because I think that is my way of making it seem not so hard. I don’t know, so if you find those words, or tones throughout my writing; do know I am truly grateful, thankful, and wouldn’t choose anything else but this struggle. 😊 haha

With that being said, something that has been on my mind lately is the topic of fear.  The more I find myself looking at it’s place in my life, the more complex I determine it to be.  I think fear often has a bad reputation. From a young age you might have been like me and heard other kids say to you something like, “Ooooh are you afraaaaaiid??!!” when put in a questionable situation. Of course, like all the other kids that age I would puff up my chest, put on my most ‘ahh how offensive’ stink face and say “Noooooo are you?!?”. When if I were to be honest, most likely my answer should have been yes. So naturally, it became easy to constantly deny fear in my life, especially when it was controlling me. I know each person has their individual fears, but mine were along the lines of defining myself: “Oh my goodness what if I don’t get into medical school?! Then what will I do?! Nothing else is appealing to me?! Then what if I don’t have a career or direction and then I can’t have a family because I can’t support myself and then ___” and the thoughts continued.  With that being my primary focus, each time I fell short it affected my entire outlook of who I was, or who I thought I should be. With each test I took I put the weight of my future on it and I had insane test taking anxiety. For instance, often I didn’t even finish my calculus tests because I would be overwhelmed with the thought of failing that I would freak out, run out of time, and I can’t leave out that I am HORRIBLE at math.  I flew through college to try and spin that as an admirable quality, I signed up for every activity because it might help me (and I enjoyed taking my mind off of studying, which then created a viscous cycle if you can imagine). I learned throughout that with the help of many great mentors in church and with my dad, how to trust God’s plan and to balance fear, because I did not have a healthy relationship with it.

So, with all of that not being far behind me, it is easy to remember that weakness. I look at where I am now, and it is interesting.  Fear has always been present in my life, but I think it is where we incorporate it that matters most.  For me personally it is a terrific motivator. If I hear that an upcoming test is “the hardest” I will study my buns off trying to not let it beat me.  Where as when I think something is easy, I put less effort into it and don’t try as hard.  That whole process has never made sense to my dad he would always say something like, “Don’t blow it on the easy things, still try and work hard at it then so then you aren’t trying to make up for it with more complicated things.” Not just applying to school, but life in general.  Given, he must have a different kind of motivation or something, I don’t know he’s like a magical unicorn.  Back to the point, but yes, I think a little fear is good. For instance having a fear of God (not of like talking to Him, but more like of his omnipotent, sovereign, ‘He is so much greater than I, and He is in control’ kind of way..at least for me). It has kept me out of bad places in my life. That being drugs, relationships, circumstances, etc.  Sometimes if we don’t let fear be shut off, it can allow you an opportunity to pause and listen for wisdom.  I look back and I am so thankful that I was hesitant and “afraid” in certain relationships because something didn’t feel right otherwise I would have missed out on what was to come. I am thankful that I have never recreationally used drugs for many reasons, but one being fear. The examples could continue. Again, there has to be a balance with it in our lives, it is not called to a higher place than God or His wisdom. I think if we allow ourselves a moment to think, we can see where fear isn’t such a bad thing and has allowed us an opportunity to take that extra moment to weigh our options and go from there.

Facing Forward

Life is weird.  If you would have told me even 6 months ago that I would feel the way I feel now, learn the things that I’ve learned, stress as much as I have, and hold the relationships that I do… I would have said you are crazy.

I have learned that life is completely unexpected and unknown until you arrive in that moment.

I guess the whole point of this post started from a small seed of frustration.  Frustration from realizing that people are just in fact people. No matter what they say or proclaim.  Social media is really good at keeping people who once held a strong presence in your life- directly in your face with the things that they post.  The posts are not the problem, they just remind me of the people that used to have a significant spot in my heart and life.  I guess the frustrating part is not some dramatic problem that occurred or even an event at all, but rather empty promises.  It is weird the things people will say and promise but their actions never even come close to it.  This post honestly is not even making that much sense other than just realizing as I type this that I regret the time that I spent catering or going out of my way for these sorts of people.  Now that I have only a few hours at a time that I am not studying, I have found myself looking back and wondering how I used to spend my time and see that hardly any of it holds substance now.

Who knew that this would be another thing that my dad would be right about.  Alright, I guess if I had to have an overall “theme” to this post it would be: Spend time with your family, chase your dreams, and do what you need to do to get there.  I look back at the times where I sort of ditched my family to chase others around and help them because I thought I held a significant place in their life, but I’ve realized that sometimes people just use you or the resources that you have- whether that be your time, energy, or whatever. Oh how I would love to be with my family now. Sometimes I drive home after a test just to see them for a few hours, and drive back to school. I’ve recognized also that no matter how supportive people around you may seem, your dreams are ultimately your own and it is up to you if you want to try to make them happen or not. Now that I see who is still a part of my life, I am thankful that I did not listen to the advice of those around telling me that if I were to chase this dream, I’d have to give up another. Which is another reason why I am thankful for such a loving, supportive family that extinguished those voices in my mind, who knows what I’d be doing now if they had not.

Basically, I’ve learned to look at the people that are present (maybe not physically, but emotionally or supportive) in my life, rather than dwelling on those that I thought would be there.

I am so blessed to be where I am now, but I would be completely lying if I said I hadn’t underestimated it.  Thankfully, the relationships that I hold now are unbelievable. I could not have hand selected better people to be in my life.  Some are in front of me daily, others I see often, and some our relationship is maintained by text messages and social media for right now- and I’ve learned that is okay.

The Number One Lie I Told Myself Going Into Medical School

Party!

So I just took my first exam less than one hour ago, I have spent the last half hour doing laundry, cleaning out the fridge, and preparing material for lab. I have to go back to class in 35 minutes… I am pretty dang tired!

I was talking to some classmates and we all seem to be living in kind of this shocked state. Not necessarily bad or good. Over the weekend(including when I got out of class Friday afternoon), I have spent probably 38 hours of it studying for that exam.  The funny thing is, is that it is so dense I still didn’t even feel like I was ready for it when I was sitting in the exam room!! Quite a feeling to have… It should be noted that I consider myself a slow learner though, so I am sure there were classmates that spent only a few handfuls of hours and mastered it! To each their own though!

Anyways, a conversation that I have had with almost every single classmate that I have talked with is: We thought the hardest part would be getting in! I remember telling my dad, “I am horrible at standardized tests(MCAT) and if they would let me in I know that would be my hardest part!” Well fast forward about half a year and here I am, believe me when I say that was the easiest part! Which is saying a lot because I really had a time preparing all of that too!

I really cannot describe the amount of material that has to be mastered and so quickly.  I already have 1 full binder for only one class and I am only a week in! For the test I just took I had more than 20 pages of summary notes… Summary notes people! It’s just crazy because you wrap up essentially around 5 p.m. and if you are like me you do not even have enough time before bed to master the material given that day (as of right now)! I am in a constant state of amazement.  However, I have heard from many 2nd year students that your brain adapts rather quickly! (I’ll let you all know when/if that happens! hahaha)

I read a potentially depressing post earlier in the week about the careers most people are unsatisfied in. A doctor was one of them, and without an amazing support system (family for me) and several other things, I can easily see why! All I have to say is I am so thankful that I have God to lean on during this.  I know WITHOUT A DOUBT that without Him: a). I would not be here and b). I could not do this alone!

Overall, this post could be taken pessimistically but that is not at all how I am feeling! I am stressed sure, but I am honestly amazed! Amazed at the material I have already learned, amazed at my new friends around me, just kind of floating on a cloud because I still have not comprehended how blessed I am to even be here! I’ll keep you all posted on different things or if new things come up. To finish, I hope that you are chasing after your goals no matter what anyone else thinks about them or how impossible they may seem to accomplish from where you stand. I am a firm believer that there is always a way!

Have a great day!

How Unexpected Could The First Week Of Medical School Be?

I cannot remember all these twists and turns, none of it went as planned but somehow turned out more beautiful than I could ever imagine.

I just got out of class on my official “First Day of Class”. Everything I am describing in this post happened during Orientation Week (last week).

When I open my eyes to acknowledge God, it is funny how involved He truly is in EVERYTHING.

I’ll start out with ending up at LMU-DCOM.  I applied to many DO schools this year, (I was never interested in MD- I like the hands-on, holistic side of being an osteopathic doctor) and there were a few schools that I wanted to go to simply because of the location.  However, upon sincerely researching I narrowed it down to 2 schools that I REALLY wanted to go to. My top choice school was well above my second. My second-choice school was LMU-DCOM. Oh how things have changed now… I realized more recently negative people, or potentially envious people, will put you down however they think they can.  Firstly, I post things on social media but I hardly ever told people I was going to medical school.  Many people think that I am going to LMU to finish my undergrad and I do not correct them.  However, some that I told were so excited for me while others were very quick to be like, “Have you ever been there? There’s nothing!” or “Did you want to go there?” or they look at you almost with pity.  I wish it weren’t the case, but this bothered me! Next thing you know as a defense mechanism I began telling people my plans  like, “Shew I know, there is nothing down there…” and continue on with that kind of explanation.  The weirdest part is that these Negative Nancys are not even educated on the process, or how hard it is to just get into ONE DANG SCHOOL! This is not undergrad, you do not just choose where you go and walk in (even some undergrads you can’t do that).  In the schools I applied to, you’re fighting against 6,000 other applicants for ~200 seats.  At other schools, even worse!

Anyways, next thing you know I was feeling slightly negative about my school selection based on absolutely nothing other than people’s opinions!! That is crazy looking back! All the sudden the HUGE blessing that God gave me seemed not good enough and I felt slightly discouraged and like I was not good enough.

Well fast forward to moving here and attending Orientation.  First, my landlord is a God send. He is incredible, friendly, and wants the best for each person that he works with. I remember meeting him and thinking thank you Lord! Next, my friends could not be better.  I remembered the struggle of undergrad and basically only being in the science center and dealing with some very vocal individuals that would constantly be rude, or speak about how they don’t agree with my faith (without me asking might I add).  I will never forget the first day of undergrad an older student spoke up in class and said, “If you do not believe in Evolution, you should not even be a science major.” Which later I learned evolution is not a theory meant to replace/describe creation so the student was wrong about TWO things… Anyways, I kind of expected that to be very present here or even worse at this level.  I could not have been more wrong.  People are incredibly respectful to all, and the friends I met on the first day have the same beliefs as me! It took me until like the second year to find that in undergrad, besides having my already forever best friend.

The final surprise.

Well up to this point I had not been accepted to my top pick. I interviewed earlier in the year and had been waitlisted.  Next thing you know I got a call and an email saying I WAS ACCEPTED on my birthday! I remember reading it and being like yes and no at the same time.  If I would have never experienced LMU-DCOM I would have automatically chosen the other based solely upon fantasy.  However, my path to DCOM was so God given I felt like there was truly a reason I was here.  After struggling with the decision all weekend I chose to remain at DCOM because there is just something about it that I never could have anticipated.

I am reminded that God allows us to choose.  He opened up both doors to me and I am thankful for that. One He clearly revealed himself along the way, the other I really wanted myself for pride, prestige, and excitement. Do I think my first choice was bad? Not at all, but I sincerely feel in my spirit that DCOM is where I am supposed to be. He revealed Himself so much on my path getting here that I know where I need to be.

I think it is important to know that when faced with a confusing decision or mixed messages, God has usually shown Himself in one way or another but we have to choose to see that.

I better stop typing though, I have my first anatomy lab in a few hours and I need to study up can’t fall behind already.  Overall, I’ve fallen in love with the program, the faculty and staff truly care, and LMU-DCOM is not at all what a few people from my hometown projected it to be like.  I am so in love and honored to be here.

Introvert or Insecure?

It is quite interesting how if you believe something about yourself, your actions will start to reflect that feeling. Whether what you believe about yourself is actually true or not.

In my more recent years I have learned that relaxing at home is really where it is at. Who knew the adults had it right after all? When I was younger, you could not pay me to be at home. When I was there, I would complain that I was so bored and absolutely nothing that could fix my boredom was at home. Now home seems to be my fix for everything/everyone. Once I realized this change in behavior, it made me wonder why? After briefly thinking about it I have two obvious reasons:
1). I’ve grown up. I no longer am seeking someone or something to entertain me. I’ve learned to be content with quietness and my own thoughts.
2). Life is already busy enough as it is.

My next thought though was, “I think I’m an introvert?” I know, I know.. this seems crazy to those that really know me, but for the last year or so that is what I had been trying to convince myself.

And it had almost worked.

I guess somewhere in the back of my mind I thought if I could convince myself that I’m just an introvert, then I wouldn’t have to address the real issue- insecurity.
A group of people would want to go out and I’d think, “Oh no, I’m sure they don’t really want me to go.” Or “What if I don’t know what to say and they think I’m not interested in being their friend?” Or more commonly, “What if I act totally myself and they see just how ridiculous I am and don’t approve.” On a more superficial level even the simple request of friends asking me to the pool and me declining because I don’t view myself as the perfect looking person I had always wanted to be. When written out like that, those thoughts seem extreme and crazy, but in the moment they had been subtle but highly influential. I dismissed it as my newfound introverted personality.

Thoughts similar to those had kept me from speaking to new people because I thought that I might not have any important words to say.

But I’m just an introvert.

From praying with people even when I KNEW I was supposed to because what if I was wrong? (As if I know more than the Lord Almighty…)

But shew I’m just an introvert.

From avoiding new relationships because then I’d have to be open with more people and risk potential disappointment.

But I should be home relaxing right now, I’m so introverted.

It’s amazing how what we identify to be can so drastically affect who we are really called to be…
God did not call me to cower in a corner afraid to speak to people because of what they might think of me. The Bible says,
Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”

God did not call me to prevent important relationships from being built because I felt incapable.
The Bible says,
1 Thessalonians 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

God did not call me to walk into a room insecure and unsure of who I am.
He calls me beautifully and fearfully made.
A daughter of the King.

When looking back it makes me wonder, how many prayers should I have prayed that may have needed to be heard? How many relational opportunities did I lose because I never felt good enough? And so many other opportunities.
While dwelling on the past like that is not helpful…It is time that we take hold of the lies that others or even we sometimes place on ourself and recognize it as it truly is.

We need to be careful not to distort the real meaning of an introvert. Maybe you are one, or maybe you are not but similar to me. It’s time we remember who God has called us to be. Walk humbly in peace because we know what He thinks of us. That our worth is not defined by a parent, friend, sibling, significant other, or anyone else except by Jesus. That we speak to that person we may not know and say something encouraging and not mind if they think we are crazy. That we invite new people places and learn about them and share our testimony with them not worrying about if they “approve” or not. Imagine a world where we are humble and secure in who we are, treat other people with respect, show love actually unconditionally, share a burden with someone even if it makes us temporarily uncomfortable. Looks pretty incredible to me. That’s the world I am striving for.

 

The Fisher of Men can easily become a Fish Bowl for Men

My love of Church and love of the People within it can never be lost by the disappointment of those same individuals. Churches are meant to be breeding grounds for new believers. Not breeding grounds for goldfish to be fed to Oscars. Churches are meant to be spaces for sharing a belief amongst the believers, not an exclusive bowl to contain them. A fishbowl has water that is needed to keep the fish alive. A Church has the Spirit that performs that and also its members that are called to do the same. A fishbowl that is never cleaned or filled with fresh water is like a Church that is ran by families or members that never allow growth, change or descent. Removing roles of leadership or changing them without input because it doesn’t fit the few who rule? Without the decency for discussion? Direction given only by way of few, for the few. All in the name of keeping the family where it believes it has been given an unchangeable place to be. Small fish placed in a bowl grow together and they never realize that they haven’t grown beyond the bowl. A few fish chasing and nipping at the others, believing that only they really belong in there? A mafia’s family without the family. Critique is not welcomed, unless it edifies themselves. This isn’t what Christ asked us to be when we were called, as members to His church. To His family. A fishbowl that is never cleaned or filled with fresh water will eventually pollute itself, to the point where all members will become toxic and no longer thrive.
Do fish in a bowl know they are in a bowl? Have they gotten so use to the clear walls of their surroundings that they believe in only themselves, as their sole means to survival? Do fish in a bowl not know that they don’t find food, it is delivered to them? The only clean water is changed water, so that they can continue to exist. Do fish in a bowl believe it is their bowl? Do they recognize that it exists, at and for the pleasure of others? Do the fish believe their main purpose is to swim in circles believing they are free? Do they really buy into the idea that they are only to be looked at and to appear friendly to those who are watching them swim?
No, my Church will not be a fishbowl. I will be an active part of the membership. I will stand outside the bowl if I must, to occasionally observe how the plastic plants and ivory towers are arranged and if they are serving their function. I will not be chased or nipped at or hide within the rocks. God has a plan for all of His children and a Church should have a plan for each of its members. A fishbowl should not contain us, nor should a Church. The Church only exists for its members and each member exists to please God. As Christians we belong in a Church. We are not fish. We should not live in a bowl. If I were a fish, I would be called to swim the oceans and spread his Word and not expect to live out my life within the safety of a bowl. I am to reach outward to save them, not inward to help myself. Changing souls and containing them behind glass was never our divine purpose. No, my Church will not be a fishbowl. We are all called by God to be the fisher of men…… never called to be a fishbowl for them.

The Aftermath of Answered Prayers

 

I find myself just laughing at God’s sense of humor sometimes. It is quite funny once that next piece of the puzzle is revealed and it reminds me just how fickle-minded and pubescent my wants have been.

The Lord has really answered a lot of prayers for me since the last time I’ve posted on here, I’m not quite sure where to begin. He has navigated people into my life at exactly the right time, down to the minute. He has provided me a clear path to walk for now with direction. Although the next half is unsure, He has proven His faithfulness thus far so I won’t doubt.
He has opened my eyes to different obstacles I have tried to brush under the rug for years! He has placed people in my life and removed that I wouldn’t have ever imagined. For the better. I’m writing with joy and thankfulness this time. I’ve decided I have to quit fearing the various parts of life that are unknown, because I’ve seen what He has done up to this point. I look forward to what is coming although it is something I have absolutely no idea how to handle or navigate. But I know who has taken me this far, and He will not leave me now.

So goodbye for now my older posts of fear, doubt, and questioning. I’m living in a season of built up faith, joy, hope, and excitement. I know those old feelings of fear will come up, but I’ve been reminded of who I serve so no longer will they distract me. Instead I will acknowledge them, pray, and laugh a little because I must be headed out of my comfort zone into more of whatever it is God has.

Lack of Correction Within the Church

This is a post I’ve wanted to write for a long while, probably like two years but stopped because …you’ll understand. Haha

One thing I’ve noticed since becoming involved in church is the lack of correction among its members. It’s so common to hear things like, “Shew, those sinners sure need to come to church.” “They need Jesus…” And I think you get the point… We are so quick to point out the obvious faults in those around us, but hardly ever take that finger and point it back at our lives. It’s even funny because some act like once we come to church, we don’t even need God anymore but instead we are. This is why the church has a bad name, it is exaggerated sure! But the exaggeration comes from a small truth.

Why I explained that above leads me to this. It’s that same mentality that allows mistreatment within the church. I know personally the greatest hurt I have ever encountered came from church people. I know many others that agree. I’ve heard all the excuses for this like, “You just put a greater trust in church people.” “Your expectations are just higher.” “Church people are just imperfect people.” All of that kind of thing. And let me just clear the air before this is further dismissed with the same old thing.
I put an equal trust in every relationship.
I understand the problems with crazy expectations..majority of those ended in high school.
Lastly, I understand church people are imperfect, duh! So let’s treat them that way instead of pretending they do no wrong!
I’m sick and tired of hearing about falling outs in the church between people, and hearing members excuse the behavior without ever correcting it.
“Oh she/he is always like that.” That doesn’t condone that kind of behavior! Are we going to treat them like they are an exclusion, better than others? Or are we going to hold them to the same standard that Jesus did and correct misbehaviors.
“I’m not going to get in the middle of things.” I know it is not the responsibility of the church to jump in every little disagreement. But I’m talking about big things like the way we treat one another, and those around us. If there is a situation that has not been resolved within a church and everybody is aware of it, hello! I think it is time to have a meeting. Whether in a group conference, or individually.
“They are just hurt, they’ll get over it.”
I don’t ever remember Jesus treating us this way. He understands our hurt, He listens to our problems, He allows us time to heal. I’m sick and tired (again) of those certain people in the church that go about their ways tearing people down in the church. I’m sick of the excuses for them. I’m sick of hearing they do a lot for the church, we don’t want to upset/hurt their feelings. Well you know what, it is time we quit making excuses, quit cowering down from a situation, quit being afraid to stand up for what’s right because of what others think of the position the person holds. Isn’t that what we talk about in services? Don’t be afraid to tell people you’re a Christian, it doesn’t matter what they think about you! When did that level of thinking end once people enter the church? Mature leadership handles conflict. Mature Christians acknowledge the issues within a church. Mature people understand the fundamentals of the gospel such as love.

I have so much more to say but I’m getting exhausted even thinking about it further. Don’t think I’m anti-church. I regularly attend and am involved myself. I’m just ready for church members to take accountability for the way people have been treated within the church. I’m tired of hearing “oh a little conflict and they fled out of here so quick… We know they weren’t really real.” No. They shouldn’t have to endure mistreatment in a place that should be safe. I do not blame them at all. I’ll end with this. If you’ve been hurt in a church, I’ll apologize for them. Give God another chance. I don’t care if the person that hurt you holds the highest position in a church and everyone thinks they are perfect, God knows and he sees their heart. Go back to church, but find one that you trust. You aren’t the only person that it’s happened to, really.

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